Confessions of a Hopeless Romantic (Part 2)...

This morning I cranked up the music, and the first song to come on? "Somebody to Love" I hear that! Tonight my fortune cookie says, "An admirer is concealing his affection for you." Well, dear admirer, I wish you would just confess. I find myself saying, "I'm tired of being single. I grow impatient with the thought. Am I doomed to sleep next to an empty space in the bed forever?"

But then God comes along and breaks my heart. He sends sermons on being single and I realize, I've been treating singlehood as a curse, but it's actually a huge blessing. If you only knew how long it took to realize that.

It is not wrong to desire for affection, affirmation, or attention. But the problem comes when you get desperate. And the only reason we are so desperate is because our needs are not met fast enough or how we want. Desperation is only a result of impatience. But we forget that God knows best. He knows what we need even before we do. And He's faithful. He's not cruel. He's not going to give you a desire if He has no intention of filling it. So many times we try to fit God into meeting our desires. But He doesn't work that way.

Because here's the thing. Everyone at some point in their life is single. And it's not without purpose. Because when you're single, you have the time and ability to do the things of God that people in a relationship simply can't just drop and do. God says, "Hey Rachel. I want you to go spend the summer in the Dominican Republic." Alright God. I'll go. There's no spouse to talk to about it. No kids to leave behind. Just me and God and the Dominican Republic. There is no boyfriend to distract me from what I'm doing. No boyfriend to miss. I'm a much better servant, knowing my heart isn't divided.

Now, this isn't to say that we should all stay single for the rest of our lives. However some are called to it. But it is to say that's why everyone is single for at least a season. There is a time and a place for everything (Ecclesiastes 3:1) As Pastor Russ pointed out, being single is a blessing God gives people to fully devote themselves to Him. And until you are fully surrendered, you cannot hope to be successful in your marriage. Because marriage magnifies selfishness. If you're not ready to fully give yourself to God then you can't possibly devote yourself to a spouse.

And maybe you were like me. Maybe you have given up on love. Not say that love doesn't exist, you just don't think you'll ever find it. How many times have I said these words? I honestly couldn't tell you. But I thoroughly believed them for a long time as depressing as it is. And I know what you're saying "Rachel, you're only 19. Get real." Guess what? I'm saying it now too. Because here's another point that Russ showed us. Adam kind of felt the same way. God brought before him male and female of every animal and had Adam name them! Who knows how long that took! But Adam could find "no suitable helper" (Genesis 2:19) But then God crafted Eve. And she was made specifically for him. "Bone of my bone. Flesh of my flesh" (Genesis 2:23)

And that in there lies my problem. I have removed God from my love life. I've picked and listed certain qualities that I want in a man, and when one comes close I fall for him, never actually even getting close to dating. But I'm being sooo stupid! Because I'm trying to be in a relationship with someone that wasn't specifically crafted for me. And as much as it pains me to admit, I haven't found him yet. Because when you try and take it into your own hands it's extremely frustrating.

But here's the thing, if God just gave us someone without us waiting for it, we would never appreciate it. We wouldn't view it as a gift. So I think it's time for Rachel's Random Analogy of the day: Finding a spouse is like finding a diamond in the sand. It takes a lot of time and patience. And you have to have some direction (from God) or you will never find it. But once you do it is the most pure and genuine love you could imagine. Because the sand (God's hand) has crafted him and molded him to fit you perfectly. And then you have truly found your "diamond in the rough." And it is permanent because God's hand is all over it! "...Therefore, what GOD has joined together, let no man separate." (Mark 10:7) Finding a spouse is NOT your job. And that is why it is so sacred. That is why it is so Holy. Because it is the work of an Almighty God!

No matter where you're at, God has someone specifically crafted for you. And if He calls you to be single for life, He will take away the desire and show you what to desire after. So don't worry about your dating life. Because you're Father is saving you baggage that you're just begging to carry. Be atuned to His voice. It's hard to wait. I'm still going to struggle with it. But I look forward to the day when God either tells me I'm going to be single for forever (like Mother Theresa- which admit it, she had a pretty darn good life), or He says, "Pssst. Hey Rachel. That's him. He's perfectly crafted just for you. Aren't I good? Way better than any guy you could have ever possibly found for yourself, or worse, had your friends find. Yep, that's the one. He's not meant for anybody else. All yours, as a testament to how good I am. To how much I have blessed you. Go get 'im tiger!"

And if you are married or in a relationship, cherish that person. Because aside from your salvation, they are the most precious gift you could ever receive. But for my fellow single prowlers remember, being single is not a curse, but rather a blessing. Use it! Because like Russ also said, it's ultimately about ending up with Christ anyway. The entire point of this life, is to be with Jesus.